Sloshed In Translation

When choosing a target for sloshed, a few important factors need to be taken in to consideration. Will they respond to it, is there grasp of common logic that of a retard humping a door knob, and will their friends ( if any ) also jump on the band wagon to “retaliate” against said posting. Sometimes it works out, other times it just fizzles out… but some times even I get thrown a curve ball I didn’t expect. In this case I got a reaction from someone I couldn’t possibly fathom existed; Joyce’s “boyfriend”. Now I use the quotes because I’m not entirely convinced Joyce even has a boyfriend… considering that I was horrified that someone had the stomach to give her a child… I mean, beer goggles can produce a little trailer trash carbon copy of yourself, but to actually be able to tolerate such bridge trollish looks to form a relationship? That’s quite a fucking thing there.

…then again, they are both from Texas, for all I know they very well could be related… I suppose in the eyes of “Bryan”, anything is better than the cows on the family farm.

Hey guess what douchebag, Joyce just so happens to be my girlfriend.

Chicken butt! Oh, wait, you were being serious… sorry. Ok, I’ll play your game Bryan, guess what! Joyce is a prostitute. I like this game!

You screwed up. Big time.

Dun dun duuuunnnn, enter, Bryan; The E-Tough-Guy. Boy do I love these people, keyboard warriors! Round one… FIGHT!

I’ll find out who you are

Here it comes, wait for it, it’s going to be epic, I just know it!

where you are and all I need to in order to kick the living shit out of you.

There it is! The E-Threat! Though I really wish these kids would come up with something a little more interesting…. I mean if I had a nickle for every time someone has told me they were going to “kick the living shit out of me”, I’d have enough to fill a sock and end Bryans inbred blood line forever. So lets make some logical deductions about Bryan, shall we?

• He’s not the Father of Joyce’s illegitimate child.
• As I said above, inbred.
• Well spoken, but all in all has shit for brains.
• Will end up and abusive drunk to Joyce, and her child… if they last that long.
• Has a gene pool so shallow it makes Paris Hilton look deep.

You’re nothing but a sad pathetic low life that hates themselves so they figure they have to post shit about others that’s false in order to make themselves feel better.

You forgot; Drunk, virgin, unintelligent, unattractive, lonely, and virgin, wait, I said that already… Come on man, keep up with the rest of the class.

Way to go douche-bag totally original work here.

Why thank you, I’m glad you enjoy my obvious talents.

Or at least that’s what I’d say if it were the truth and actually were original.

So wait, now you’re taking back what you just said? Well that wasn’t very nice of you, telling a bold face lie. Do you tell Joyce that the mere sight of her pug looking face doesn’t induce the urge to projectile vomit your cousins semen as well? How deep does your exaggeration go, I wonder.

But guess what there’s a ton of losers like you out there that do the same things that you do. You just chose the wrong girl to do it to.

I beg to differ, I think I chose a perfect target. Got my desired reactions, as well as some addition entertainment.

I’ll find you. Just wait it out buddy.

Can you pick up some cigarettes and vodka on your way? I’m running low… but please when you arrive, please don’t just stalk outside my window masturbating like you do while watching Discovery’s; The mating habits of the American Sheep…. it’s not that I would be honored at your sentiment… it’s just creepy is all.

Wait… I figured it out…

Bryan is her pimp!