Sloshed In Translation

I usually don’t include comments in the mail bag unless they are a paragraph or more, you know, something with a little meat attached to it… but in this case a comment left by Joyce’s brother.. I mean, boyfriend had Vinny and I just about falling out of our seats laughing.  This comment of course was induced by the little write up I did about him. Continue Reading…

When choosing a target for sloshed, a few important factors need to be taken in to consideration. Will they respond to it, is there grasp of common logic that of a retard humping a door knob, and will their friends ( if any ) also jump on the band wagon to “retaliate” against said posting. Sometimes it works out, other times it just fizzles out… but some times even I get thrown a curve ball I didn’t expect. In this case I got a reaction from someone I couldn’t possibly fathom existed; Joyce’s “boyfriend”. Now I use the quotes because I’m not entirely convinced Joyce even has a boyfriend… considering that I was horrified that someone had the stomach to give her a child… I mean, beer goggles can produce a little trailer trash carbon copy of yourself, but to actually be able to tolerate such bridge trollish looks to form a relationship? That’s quite a fucking thing there. Continue Reading…

For some reason I never grow tired of the knee jerk response people have to being written about over the internet.  You know what I’m talking about, the paragraph of them babbling about how much they don’t care, or how pathetic and beneath them I am.  Example; Continue Reading…

Honestly, are you people even trying anymore?

Don’t like being called inbred pedophiles.

…who knew?

 Well I was going to continue playing with Jared but in all honesty this has become a bit stale. It’s basically turned in to a back and forth of me writing, him calling me sir and trying to convince me how much he doesn’t care. Also threatening to sue me… which, well, he can’t. Damn that whole information obtained within the limitations of public domain… As most of my rantings are, this entire thing has been a satire ( Don’t get me wrong, I think the moral majority of those that claim “Juggalo” are completely worthless… like asshole on elbow worthless ), but like all satires do, this one has run its course. Which sucks of course, because now I have to find a new group of targets to play with. Awe, sad face.  Continue Reading…

The best part of waking up, is trailer trash in your… err… voice mail.  Being that I’m at the office right now, not really going to comment much further than;

• You’ve left a total of 5 messages, put down the pipe and pick up a book kiddo.
• Might want to think about suing Google first.
• I like turtles.

….Jesus Christ I need some coffee… way too early for this shit.

When I started the previous weeks games with the “I’m so thug my Mom buys my socks for me” kids there was one that has been piping up in their cute little chat room acting “Hard”.  The problem I had with playing with him is that he’s 15 years old… and generally speaking I *TRY* to leave the pre-pubescent alone.  So in this case you are going to notice I go just a LITTLE bit easier on the child…  Don’t want to over-step legal boundaries, so on, so forth. Continue Reading…

Yeah yeah, better late than never.  Though technically speaking, the passing of 396 days equating to “a new year” is a slightly flawed idea to begin with as time ( in a philosophical sense ) started the day you ( personally ) were born.   Ah yes, New Years, a magical time of year for people to lie to themselves promising grand ideas they never seem to follow through… The whole resolution idea hasn’t ever made too much sense to me.  “I treated my body like shit all year! But this is a new year!  I’ll do better this time!”  Yeah, that’s sane.  Here’s an idea;  Did you live through last year?  Well, I’d say that’s a pretty damn good accomplishment, why not try to repeat that?  ( Or don’t, the lot of humanity annoys me to begin with so one less knuckle dragging ass-fuck will only improve my chances of avoiding homicide this year )… anyways.   Happy New Year.  Nothing will change here… well, some things will… as I just figured something out this evening! Continue Reading…

As most of you know, when someone leaves a comment so long that it in it of itself could be considered an article, I like to take the time to give it the proper attention it deserves. Seeing that said person is obviously deprived of attention at home, it just wouldn’t be right of me to not give him a little bit of myself!

To catch you up, last night I wrote a story about a angry little ginger. Naturally, he had more than a few things to say about that via comments. Now, he left said comment last night, yes, I could have responded to it then but I had a purpose with waiting until now which I will explain later in this article. So let’s get to it, shall we?

[ For those of you that wish to pull the “too long didn't read card, he's an idiot and here's the punch line ]

Continue Reading…